Sunday, December 30, 2012

December 30

Last Wednesday I got to sing Christmas Carols for the people at Maple Woods Nursing Home. Here's a link to the video that my grandpa put together of it.

http://youtu.be/5TlQa-IcOo4

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas! I hope everyone has a blessed holiday with their families.

Here is a link to a video that me and my siblings made for my dad(:
Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wGzdFOBJXhs&feature=share



Here are some pictures of me and my sister. We attempted to go sledding but because of the lack of snow, it didn't work so well.












Monday, December 17, 2012

Her Birthday

It was my moms birthday today. I really wish that she could have been here, but I'm glad that she got to spend her birthday with Jesus. I know that she had an amazing party up there in Heaven and I can't wait to be able to see her and celebrate her birthday with here again soon.

My brother and my sister woke up sick today. They both have a fever. I'm trying my best to stay away from them because I have a Spanish exam tomorrow and Thursday, and three English papers due on Thursday as well. This is my first high school exam experience.... and I can't say I'm enjoying it.

Anyway, I wrote a poem and I dedicated it to anyone who was affected by the shooting at the elementary school in Connecticut. There were multiple 6 and 7 year old children killed in this. I can't even begin to imagine the hurt that some parents are feeling right now. I want so badly to do something to help them, so I just started with simply writing a poem.



Broken

Why is there so much pain in this world? 
How can we make it go away? 
Why does it feel like God is so distant?
God, please don’t let us fall astray 
We all need to recognize
that God is here
He will never let us go
He is always near
This pain in our life 
could be a sign
This pain could be telling us
That God wants us to shine
We need to use our pain
and turn it around 
God wants us to let people know
that good can be found. 
Even though there is brokenness in this world 
God has everything planned
He will hold us all up
In his majestic mighty hand. 

Monday, December 10, 2012

Chapel

Last week Friday I got the privilege of leading a chapel in front of my whole school. There are about 850 people in my school (Holland Christian). A question that I got asked a lot after the chapel was "were you nervous?" The answer is no, I really was not that nervous. The night before the chapel, I thought that I was going to be so nervous. However, when I was standing on the stage watching people fill in their seats, I wasn't nervous. I was excited. I think that it was by the grace of God that I was able to be so calm. Anyway, my chapel was about how God is always there through the storm, and how pain can be turned into a blessing. I told my story. Here is a link to the chapel if you're interested in watching it.

http://www.hollandchristian.org/videos/chapel_videos

Click on the video that has the date December 7.

Monday, November 26, 2012

November 26

My friend and I took some pictures today, so I thought I'd put some on here.




















Thursday, November 22, 2012

Thursday, November 8, 2012

You are More

There's a girl in the cornerWith tear stains on her eyesFrom the places she's wanderedAnd the shame she can't hideShe says, "How did I get here?I'm not who I once was.And I'm crippled by the fearThat I've fallen too far to love"But don't you know who you are,What's been done for you?Yeah don't you know who you are?
You are more than the choices that you've made,You are more than the sum of your past mistakes,You are more than the problems you create,You've been remade.
Well she tries to believe itThat she's been given new lifeBut she can't shake the feelingThat it's not true tonightShe knows all the answersAnd she's rehearsed all the linesAnd so she'll try to do betterBut then she's too weak to tryBut don't you know who you are?You are more than the choices that you've made,
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes,You are more than the problems you create,You've been remade.You are more than the choices that you've made,You are more than the sum of your past mistakes,You are more than the problems you create,You've been remade.'Cause this is not about what you've done,But what's been done for you.This is not about where you've been,But where your brokenness brings you toThis is not about what you feel,But what He felt to forgive you,And what He felt to make you loved.
You are more than the choices that you've made,You are more than the sum of your past mistakes,You are more than the problems you create,You've been remade.
You are more than the choices that you've made,You are more than the sum of your past mistakes,You are more than the problems you create,You've been remade.You've been remadeYou've been remade.You've been remade.You've been remade.

You are More by Tenth Avenue North

Saturday, November 3, 2012

November 3

video
My sister Emily and I got kinda bored this afternoon.... So we decided to make this video(:

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Homeless Event

I did a homeless event with my church a while back. Here is the paper I wrote about it. (I had to write a paper for our Church).


Imagine not knowing where you next meal will come from. Imagine not knowing where you are to sleep tonight. Imagine having to make sacrifices everyday just so that you can survive. The High School youth group got the privilege of not just imagining all of that, but experiencing it. We went homeless for thirty hours. We ate lunch and dinner at the Mission in Holland with actual homeless people. We got to engage in conversations with homeless people who had amazing stories. When it started to get dark, we headed back to the Church to sleep outside in the woods on card board boxes. The girls and the guys split up into two groups. The guys had made it back before the girls, and when we (the girls) arrived back in the woods, we were very surprised at what we saw. The guys had caught a squirrel, and were roasting it over the fire. Some people actually ate the squirrel, while others looked at it with disgust on their faces. This homeless event changed the lives of many of us. We realized that we have so much compared to some people. Some people have absolutely nothing, however, they cling onto the Lord with everything that they have. I about fell to my knees when I saw these homeless people worshiping the Lord at Hart Side Church. They focus on nothing but the Lord. I could see Jesus shining brightly through each and every one of them. This proved to all of us that God is here with us, even though we can not see Him. God is holding each and every one of our hands. These homeless people taught us that God is bigger than all of our fears put together. God will rescue us from the darkness, and bring us back to a light that will never burn out. That is how big God’s love is for us. 

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Music Video

video
Holland Christian did not have school last Thursday, Friday, Monday, or Tuesday, so me and my siblings and a friend decided to make a music video on one of those days off. I hope you enjoy it!

Saturday, October 6, 2012

October 6

I do not have any courage whatsoever right now to write. I have tried over and over again, but for some reason I can't. So, for this post, I'm just going to encourage you to look over to my dads blog if you haven't already. It is www.briankristi.blogspot.com. On there is the video of my moms funeral/burial service.

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Emily

I'm writing a paper for English. I'm writing about how to keep strong when you lose a parent. I used my younger sister Emily to help me write it. I asked her a couple questions. . . part of our conversation went like this: "Emily, do you think Mom is ever going to come back?" The simple word that she said next almost broke me down into tears. She said this. "yes." She thinks my mom is coming back. I wanted to tell her that our mom is not coming back, but I just couldn't. I don't know if I made the right decision or not. I wish that I could tell Emily that she's right.... that my mom is coming back. But I can't. She's never coming back. as much as I miss her. I know she's never coming back. No matter how many times I ask for her, it's not going to happen. I want to see her, I want Emily to see her, I just wish she was here. Life would be so much easier.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

September 19

Well, I finally finished all the paperwork for going to read the Bible at Oak Crest. I'm going there tomorrow to turn it in, so hopefully I'll be able to start really soon. I'm really excited to start, but I'm also really nervous because if you've ever met me, you will know that I'm not the most... strong-willed person ever. I'm like my mom I guess, I like to stay in the "background" of things. So, this is a huge step up for me, I would have never imagined myself doing this 5 years ago.


My dad took my school pictures a while ago, so here's a couple of them.  I'll post Nathan and Emily's pictures once my dad takes them. 









Thursday, September 6, 2012

September 6

School is going really well, I really like high school. I actually wake up excited to go to school(:
I love English. I have it 8th hour, so I get to look forward to it all day :) It's a great way to end the day. In English, all we do is write. That's why I like it. Here is one of the many writings that I wrote:

Shine Bright
The bright, astounding, shining sun brings warmth to my heart. If the sun can shine so brightly day after day, then so can I. I can shine with the love of Jesus, and so can everyone else. I appreciate the sun because it encourages me to try and shine with the Love of Jesus. My mom told me this when she was laying in the hospice bed “I’m not going to give you a list of things that I want you to do in your life. I just want you to always trust in Jesus.” I replied to her saying, “I will, I promise.” So now I won’t only trust in Him, but I’ll shine for him. If I can get other people to shine for Jesus too, even God will have to put on his sun glasses to be able to look down at us. We will shine brighter than the sun itself.

Recently, I decided that I want to do something that will impact this world. I know I already have a blog, but I want to do something more big that just write. So, I decided that I want to somehow lead people to Jesus. I asked my dad if I could go to a nursing home and read the residents there some scripture from the Bible. I know they're old, but if I want to lead as many people to Jesus as I can. Who knows, maybe I'll end up changing a life or two. I don't know how it will go, but I'm really excited to find out. Anyway, I ran this idea by my dad and he said that it's a great idea. I'm really excited to get started.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

August 28

I kinda need you here mom. Pretty much really bad. I wish you could come back and I know that's selfish, but it's the truth.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

1st day of High School

Well, today was my first day of high school. That building is soooo big. I only got lost once, though. It was only a half of a day so all of our classes were 5 minutes. All the teachers seem really nice, which is good. But, of course, I'm getting sick. I woke up today not feeling so well and now I have a cold.... and it sinks. Nathan and Emily also had a good 1st day, Emily is going into 2nd grade and Nathan is going into 6th. So, we all had pretty good first days and hopefully a good year will follow(:

Thursday, August 16, 2012

August 16

I wrote this poem tonight and thought that I would share it, so here it is :)

How can I get through this? 
How am I suppose to stay strong? 
I want to be a normal kid
why does pain have to sting so long? 
Jesus can you hear me? 
I kinda have a situation here. 
I'm drowning and can't find the surface
and I feel as if no one is near. 
my mom meant everything to me 
and now all I can do to feel close to her is write. 
Jesus, it would be pretty cool if you could give me a sign from her some night. 
but for now I'll just pray
I'll put all my trust in  you. 
i hope that in the future, everything will turn out okay. 

Monday, July 23, 2012

July 23

Every thing's going pretty well here-VBS (Vacation Bible School) has started and I'm teaching kindergarten. It's really fun! I love being with kids.
It's my 15th birthday tomorrow! I'm bringing cookies tomorrow for my kindergarten class, I made cookies tonight without too many problems, and that's quite an accomplishment with my baking skills. (I can't bake... at all.) I wish my mom could be here for my 15th birthday. When I was little I always dreamed of someday being 15. But, I imagined my mom being here to celebrate it with me. . . My mind still hasn't wrapped around the whole idea that she's gone. . and I don't think it ever will.

Sunday, July 8, 2012

camping

We went camping last week, and it was so hot. It was record heat in Michigan, it got up to 104 degrees where we were camping. We went to the beach every day we were there, and yes, I got sun burned. I forgot to wear sun screen for only 2 hours, and my whole back was fried. I couldn't even do my own hair. It wasn't good, but it turned into a tan so it's all good now :) We went camping with my moms side of the family, we had a lot of fun. Here are some pictures of our week.

 The sunset was SO amazing. My cousins and I went out to the sand bar of lake Michigan and watched the sun until it was gone. 



On the last night that we were there, we lit lanterns into the sky. As soon as I saw that we were going to do that, I wanted to break into tears because the lanterns reminded me of what they did at relay for life. They let lanterns fly into the sky there, too. I think I put in an earlier post that the lanterns kind of remind me of what happened with my mom. She was here, then she was gone. Just like the lanterns once we set them on fire and then let them go. Anyway, we had one lantern for each family. All of the lanterns went up into the air, but ours. Our lantern got lit, and then me and my dad were holding it until the fire filled up the lantern with enough air, my dad said let go so we let go of the lantern and watched it go up... for about 2 seconds. Then, it completely dropped and landed in the lake.  I have to say it was kind of entertaining to watch the fire go out from the water, but I wish it would have gone into the air. I think the only reason ours was the only one that didn't go into the air is because my mom wasn't there. Every other family had a "complete" family. (A mom, a dad, that sort of thing.) My grandma and my grandpa, my Aunt Lori and Todd, and my Aunt Stephanie and my Uncle Kevin. If my mom was here, I'm 100% sure that our lantern would have gone into the air-and not into the lake.



Saturday, June 30, 2012

Camp Geneva

I don't even know where to start. Last week I went to camp Geneva. . . . it was the best week of my life. I went there not knowing if I was loved by God. I felt as if God had run out of time for me, I felt as if God didn't even hear me anymore. I felt alone. Now, I know I'm not alone. We had kind of like a Church service there, but it was a really deep service. A preacher talked about how deep God's love is for us. Then, we got to sit and reflect on our past. We got to think about how big God's love is. I broke down into tears, along with a lot of other people. God's love is so amazing, I can't even put it into words. After this service, we got to have 1 on 1's with our counselors. A 1 on 1 is where just you and your counselor go out and just talk. One thing I told my counselor is that I haven't been feeling very loved by God lately, and I told her about my mom. She completely understood. Because of her, I have realized that I'm not alone. My counselor was AMAZING. She was the reason my week was so great, I'm really going to miss her. Anyway, there was a lot more fun activities that we did there, we got to climb up a rope tower, go blobbing, go zip lining, play all camp games, go to the beach, and so much more. All in all, it was a great week. Someday, I hope I can be a counselor there.

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Relay For Life, 2012

I went to an event last night called Relay For Life. Let me tell you, that event is the highlight of the year. Relay For Life is an event where a whole lot of people gather at the West Ottawa high school track and we try to raise money to try and find a cure for cancer. People walk around the track too, so that they can feel like they are doing something to help. Walking is optional, though. I go with my neighbors. My mom use to come, also. We set up tents all around the track and just camp out for the night. (It's a 24 hour event.) Most of it, we just hang out by the tent or walk laps. It was so hot on Friday, I got so sunburned that I was sent to the First Aid place that was there. It looked like I had a mask on because of how sun burnt I was. And then of course, the people at the first aid station just start putting on LOADS of sunscreen on me, and it BURNED. I said thank you to the people who put it on, and ran to the tent and wiped it all off. Lesson learned. Put on sunscreen BEFORE you get burned. Anyway, at about 10:00pm, there is a walk where there are bags with candles inside of them. The bags say names of people who have survived cancer, and people who have passed away from cancer. The bags are handmade. I made two for my mom. You can't walk that lap without shedding at least one tear. I was doing fine until they started lighting the lanterns, and then sending them out into the sky. Somebody pointed them out to me, and I couldn't keep it together anymore. I bawled. Thankfully, my youth group leader was there with me. Usually my mom walks this lap with me. . . but, she couldn't this year, and never will be able to again.  The lanterns that floated into the sky kind of reminded me of what happened to my mom. She kept getting sicker, and sicker, and then she was gone. The lights in the sky kept getting farther and farther away... and then they were gone. I don't know if that really made sense... but, last night it made sense to me. . in a way.
I walked 15 and a quarter miles for my mom.
I love you, mom.
Miss you.
See you soon.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

A year ago

A year ago from today, at about this time, I was walking around a high school track at an event called "Relay For Life." I was walking around that track to find a cure for caner. A year ago from today, I was told the most devastating news of my life. I was told "shes gone."
Mom, you are missed. I promise, I will fight for a cure.
This Friday, I will again walk at the the event "Relay for Life." I will walk for you mom, just like I promised. The last time I saw you, I promised you that I would walk so many  miles for you, more than I ever had before. I will walk for you, and I will keep that promise.

Sunday, June 3, 2012

This is the song that I wrote and then sang at my school Talent Show.
I hope you like it :)

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

May 30

Well, tomorrow's the talent show for school. . . and I'm singing that song that I put on this website earlier. I'm really nervous... but excited at the same time. Hopefully everything goes well!
Today I had my drivers training test. . . and I passed! I was literally shaking in my seat waiting for the teacher to give me back my test with a grade on it. I wanted to pass so bad! I'll get my permit on Friday and then I can drive with my dad :)
This will probably be my last update for a while because we're turning in our laptops tomorrow, and I'm really not on any computers during the summer.
Please keep us in your prayers, though, as it has almost been a whole year since she's passed away.

Monday, May 28, 2012

May 28

A year ago, my mom was in hospice. Exactly 1 year ago from last Friday she was moved there. It's kinda weird to think that I was with my mom exactly one year ago. I wish I could go back to then, yet I don't at the same time. I didn't like to see her struggle, but I did like to be with her.    


This is Hospice, the place where she stayed until she died. I liked the place a lot, but I never want to enter those doors again. 

 

Sunday, May 20, 2012

May 20

I started drivers training a week ago-I'm actually not that bad of a driver! The only problem that I have is seeing over the steering wheel. I have to sit on a pillow. :) 
The classes of drivers training are REALLY boring. But the drives are fun :) 

Here's a couple pictures of what my siblings and I do on Sundays. :)





And here's a picture that pretty much sums up what kind of relationship me and my mom had. . . we had a good one. If only it wasn't cut short.


Sunday, May 13, 2012

Thursday, May 3, 2012

A song

So, a while back I made up a song for my mom. Here is a video of some of it... there are other verses but I decided to just do the first verse for now. I'm singing this song at my school talent show :)

video
Well, I hope you enjoy it. And it is me singing, but it's not me playing the piano. I will learn how to play it eventually... but right now I don't know how to.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

April 22


I can’t go on now
without you beside me
I feel like God isn’t even there
like He promised he would be 
I can’t do anything
I want you here
mom, right now
I don’t think that even God is near
how am I supposed to go to school
how am I supposed to carry on? 
God, if you're out there
please, please, help this pain be gone. 

Monday, April 16, 2012

April 16

Emily (my sister) turned 8 on Saturday. I planned a Disney themed birthday party for her! We had 11 first grade girls at our house... it was crazy! But, it was really fun and turned out really great.

I'm in soccer, and today we had to head a soccer ball into the net... sliding through a pit of mud! Here's a picture of how our team looked after this.













We are writing a poem in Language Arts about where we are from. The directions are just to write something that makes sense to you... it doesn't have to make any sense whatsoever to anyone else! So, here's what I wrote:


I’m from
I’m from the “I love you’s” 
that could last a lifetime
the unforgettable love
that reaches to the sky
I’m from the kisses to my hands 
every night I left 
I’m from the late hot chocolate nights
that will never happen again. 
I’m from a tragic experience
from the cries during the night
from the last time I saw her
in the horrible hospice room.
I’m from the last “I love you”
that I wish to hear again
but I never will 
until the miraculous day I see her
behind Heavens gates. 
I’m from a God 
who carries me through the dark
who shines a light in me
so that I may shine
with her courage. 

Monday, April 9, 2012

April 9

Florida was amazing! It was mid 90's all week! I got the most burnt out of everyone... We were swimming in the pool one day, and everyone was telling me that  I should go put some more sunscreen on because I was looking red... but, I didn't.... so I payed for it later :/ 
We all had a really good time, though, especially at disney. :)

Here are some pictures that I edited of my siblings and me. 



Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Wednesday, March 28

Finally! Spring break!
We're going to Disney world! We're leaving tomorrow, and I'm freaking about going through the security because if you know me, you know that I DO NOT enjoy going through security. Never put peanut butter in your bag before you go through security... they don't let it pass..... I got a bag check for it.... not fun.
anyway, I hope everyone has a good spring break!

Monday, March 12, 2012

Psalm 121


Psalm 121: 
"I lift my eyes to the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let my foot slip, he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord watches over you, the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, not the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm, he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forever more." 
What this verse means: 
This verse is promising us that God watches over us and keeps us from all harm. God’s power can defeat all our weaknesses in a blink of an eye. For example, cancer. God can take cancer away in a split second. That’s what he did to my mom, unfortunately, he took both the cancer away, and her. But she’s cancer free, in a better place, so what’s to complain about? Anyway, God will protect us no matter what, all we have to do is find God. Many of us don’t realize that God is right there, in front of our eyes. Somehow, we see right through Him. God, however, gives so much grace, and by the grace of God we are saved. God holds each and everyone of us in His arms. “The Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forever more.” 

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Sunday, March 11

So, today I realized that I forgot to put a picture of my mom up yesterday because it was the 10th... so, this month instead of a picture, me and my sister emily made a video :)
video
enjoy!

Thursday, March 1, 2012

March 1

I haven't posted a picture in a while... Here's a picture of me and my sister.
:)

Sunday, February 26, 2012

February 26

I spend a lot of my time writing.... it's something I get from my mom. I love to write. Anyways, I wrote something a couple nights ago, and for some reason I feel like God really wants me to put it on this blog. So, here it is:

God’s Opportunities
We all have many different opportunities. Every ones opportunity is different. However, we do not all notice that all those opportunities come through God. God is the key to opportunity. God gave Daniel an opportunity when he was stuck in a Lion’s den with Lions. Daniel could have chose to panic, and yell at God. However, he didn’t do that, he tamed the lions, and made the lions obey him. (I give credit to my devotions for that example). Anyway, this cancer could have been an opportunity for us. That horrible, miserable, unreasonable cancer that got inside my mom was a huge opportunity for me to get closer to God. I am a new person now because of that. Some days I wonder where I would be if my mom wouldn’t have been taken by cancer. I definitely wish that my mom was still here, and that cancer wouldn’t have ever existed in our family. However this cancer was a HUGE opportunity for my faith walk with the Lord to become stronger. I can’t even put in words how much having my mom be gone tears me apart. But this could be an opportunity. An opportunity that could change the rest of our lives. All we have to do is accept it, and accepting this big of an opportunity without a mom to be here is about the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Hero Writing

For my school, there is a Michigan hero writing that we can do if we want. I decided to do it, and ended up winning 1st place for the school! The hero writing is a writing where you choose somebody from Michigan that has been a hero to you. I chose to write about my mom. This is my writing.



My Hero who had the Courage to Shine
By Ashley Rogalske
Courage gets you anywhere. I’m going to tell you about someone I knew who had a lot of courage. This person didn’t only give courage to herself, she gave courage to so many other people around the world. This special person is my very own mother. In 2007, she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Let me tell you, it’s been a rough 5 years. She battled through chemo therapy, radiation, surgeries, and so much more. However, throughout it all, God was shining through her. 
My mom had a shirt that represented her courage. It was orange with a bright sun in the middle of it. It also had black words that said “Courage to Shine” across the front. Our friends created that t-shirt for us, and the reason why they chose the words “Courage to Shine” is because before my mom went into her first surgery, she posted on her blog, “Put on your sun glasses because God is going to shine brightly through me!” She was right. God shined through her. I could definitely see Him. 
One night, I went to go visit my mom in Hospice. My dad wanted me to say a final goodbye to her before she went to be with Jesus. The first instant I saw her, my heart took one giant leap. She looked very sick and miserable. She did not look like herself anymore. I went closer to her, and the instant she saw me, she gave me the biggest smile of the day. Her eyes gleamed as they looked into mine. I could see Jesus shining right through them. She was halfway to Heaven. She was so close to running into Jesus’s arms. I was not allowed to cry, because I did not want to make her cry. She was content, and I wanted her to stay that way. The last good-bye I said to her would have broken the heart of the worlds toughest criminal. I ran out of the room into my dads arms and bawled. Just imagine walking out of glass doors, knowing that you will never see your mother again until the day you walk into Heaven. It seems tough just to imagine, but it’s even tougher experiencing it. 
Every year, there is an event called “Relay for Life” at the West Ottawa High school track. It is an event where you walk laps around the track to find a cure for cancer. There are so many teams there, and they try to raise money to find a cure for cancer. I have gone every year for the past 4 years. Last year, I walked seven teen miles for my mom because I promised her that I would. At the time, she was in hospice. Knowing that she was there, I wanted to walk so much for her, I knew that she could not be cured, but that didn’t stop me from walking. At around 9:00 at “Relay for Life”, there is a walk called “The Candlelight Walk.” It is where everybody writes the name of either cancer survivors, or of people whose lives have been taken away from cancer. Then, we put candles in them and place them all around the track. After that’s all done, everyone walks around the track and remembers everyone who has passed away, and say prayers for the people who currently have cancer. As I was walking around the track, my mom passed away in Hospice. I didn’t know at the time, but later I learned. I will never forget the moment when my dad came up to me and said “She’s gone.” I felt like the whole world had just caved in on me.  I will always remember my mom because she always had the courage to shine by just giving me a little smile. Mom, your my hero, and I want to dedicate this whole paper to you. I love you, miss you, and I’ll see you soon. 

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

February 14

I loved you because you loved me
now I'm left alone
the cancer had to take you
leaving us to weep and moan
Every night, you told me that you loved me
why can't I hear that just one more time?
I miss you more than anyone will know
I miss your courage to shine.
Why can't I hear you anymore?
Just one last I love you, is all I'm asking for.
The last words you said to me
will always be in my heart
you simply said "I love you"
those words, broke me apart.

Monday, January 23, 2012

January 23

This day may seem like an ordinary day for most of you out there. However, to us it's not. It's another anniversary. It's an anniversary we don't want to celebrate. 5 years ago on this very day my mom went into the Dr.'s office to have surgery to see what was wrong with her. The words that came out of the doctors mouth were so strong. They put my dad into shock. The Doctors told my dad that my mom had ovarian cancer. 5 years ago on this very day, my mom was diagnosed. Please pray for us today as we do not want to celebrate this horrible anniversary.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

January 10

It's been 7 months already since she passed away...


This picture makes me laugh every time I look at it. I was in Florida last week, so I decided to recreate this picture for my mom. So, here is my moms version, and underneath it is mine. 





Sunday, January 1, 2012

happy new year!
I hope everyone had a great new years Eve with their family/friends. We had a party at our house with our small group.
I'm leaving for Florida with my Aunt Lori and my Aunt Stephanie tomorrow! I'm really excited! Usually it would be my mom going with them, though. I wish it was her going with them. I'm excited to go but I'd rather have her be here and go, rather than her be gone, and I go.